Happy 2016 everyone! I was reviewing the year myself and reading my New Years blog for 2015 last year ( New Years 2015 ) which I still think has some good strategies for getting focussed on your goals and maintaining motivation.
Looking back there is one thing I wanted to add about new years resolutions and setting goals: I don’t think new years is always about changing yourself and focussing on what you don’t have but highlighting your strengths and what makes you a unique person.
Here are 5 steps to harnessing your strengths.
I recently got back from a trip to California and having lived in Ireland for 4 years I am really starting to notice the difference in attitudes and perspectives. When I was in Northern California I passed by a walking college campus tour and I heard the student leading it say “Who wouldn’t want to live here, it’s just amazing, you have surfing, the mountains, culture and more”. In contrast when I tell people in Cork that I’m from CA, they say “Why did you move here?”. Both cities in reality have positives and negatives but the way Californians presented where they lived made it more attractive.
Are we focussing on what our strengths are? What is amazing about you? You have unique personality traits, skills, experiences, passions that make you very attractive. I believe that instead of working on what we don’t like about ourselves, maybe start with enhancing what we do like and the rest might follow.
Step 1: Make a lists of what your strengths are. (e.g. I’m adventurous) And yes, you do have strengths (to get some ideas: list of strengths )
Step 2: Tell a story about a time where you used these strengths. (e.g. This one time I was travelling in a foreign country and I add (insert strange bug here)!
Step 3: Compile this list, collection of stories, or collage of pictures into a book about you. Maybe it’s a CV, brochure, or photo page. You can review these before creating an online profile or going out on a date.
Step 4: Set goals around how you could enhance or demonstrate this attribute even more this year. (e.g. make a bucket list of adventurous things you want to try).
Step 5: Share these stories with others.
One of the things that makes someone attractive is if they have a myriad of traits not just one thing. For example the smart person in the group is interesting for awhile but can get boring… but if you are smart, kind, and witty that is more dynamic.
Often we hide parts of ourselves without realising that the combination of traits makes us attractive. For example, when I used to go out socially I would often try to be funny all the time but I never talked about what I do for a living and my passion for helping people. When I started doing this, I believe I became more complex and therefore more attractive to a partner.
So this New Years, you can relax, you are already awesome… you just have to recognise it, take action to keep expressing your strengths, and share them with others.